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Thread: Your Lyrics

  1. #1
    Moderator DoubleCash's Avatar
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    Default Your Lyrics

    when u sittin' and think that its over,
    u couldn't do nuttin,somewhere u loose your power,
    when u look behind yo back,u seein' nothin',
    u feel a pain incide,special pain incide yo head,
    u gotta go away,but u're afraid lookin' around yo bed,
    sometimes ya think err'tnihgz gon' right,
    but something wrong,fuck all that,
    ya won't get no more,what's wrong,
    you cant' show your feelingz,
    all dis shit you're puttin' into yo lyrics



    could be some gramma mistakes i'm just tryin' to write in English but my English isn't perfect=) anyway check it an' plz give feeds

  2. #2
    Senior Member MicMonster's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your Lyrics

    ...........rewrite this.
    You're not conveying what you are trying to say. I cant catch the rhythm. And your not even rhyming. Overall this is just bad. You gotta rewrite this man.

  3. #3
    Moderator DoubleCash's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your Lyrics

    aight ill try do make something but anyway for the beginin' writin' in english more difficultypeace

  4. #4
    Senior Member MicMonster's Avatar
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    Default Re: Your Lyrics

    good luck with learning English. Im sure your next drop will be great.

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