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Thread: A Little Something (Lyric Critique/Help)

  1. #1
    Registered User MikeyRay13's Avatar
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    Default A Little Something (Lyric Critique/Help)

    Fear none, but I may respect few
    And I, I chose her, but I may select two
    Cause they, they so good, too much to be true
    Its crazy, how I stick to their mind, with no glue
    Damn she still want it,
    And I’m still hunnid
    I tell her back it up,
    But that b*itch still frontin’
    So I made up my mind
    Cause I can’t make up no time
    I gotta paint a pretty picture
    Til I’m sleeping just fine
    Boy, if life is a bitch,
    Then she tellin us lies
    Yet the truth is all blind
    If we can’t open our eyes…

  2. #2
    Senior Member jefpeace's Avatar
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    Default Re: A Little Something (Lyric Critique/Help)

    Thanks for posting. There's some nice wordplay here, but you don't really tell a story. Try just writing down what you're trying to say without the rhyme, then go back and do the rhyme. I've done this several times when I got stuck and it really does help. Keep on keepin' on ... peace out.

  3. #3
    Registered User MikeyRay13's Avatar
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    Default Re: A Little Something (Lyric Critique/Help)

    Thank you! I appreciate it. I have other lyrics, but I think I may use them so I don't post em here yet lol.

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